He sat at his chair, bored to death, not even knowing why he was there. He glanced at his parents who sat next to him; they had a glow in their faces. Finally, they announced his sister’s name as the best student. There was a thunderous applause as his sister walked up on stage. His parents were clapping enthusiastically while he just stared blankly, waiting for the event to end.
He used to love his sister. He used to respect her, admire her, and was proud of her. He used to be close to her since she was the only sibling she had. He doesn’t know precisely when it started to change but he does know she began to change upon entering high school. She started ignoring him. She started to stop playing video games with him. He was left to play alone and felt bored. He started to feel neglected by his own sister.
Then he entered high school as well. He realised how popular his sister was. No one knew him as him, but knew him as Lily’s brother. It infuriated him, even more when his sister ignored him at school. He started to feel hatred for this girl he used to love spending time with. He wished she would just disappear and stop making his life miserable.
One day, she barged into his room and just suddenly shouted at him asking him why he was flirting with her friends and to stop embarrassing her. He glared at her while she was shouting at him, his emotions boiling, his eyes tearing out of anger. He wasn’t even listening to what she was shouting about. When she stopped, he stood up and stormed out of his room. He went out the front door and slammed it hard. He walked out of the gate and suddenly felt his body being slammed and the world went blank.
He saw stars. He blinked 3 times and finally saw the white walls. The hospital? What happened? He then heard his mother’s voice, calling his name. By his bedside, his mother was holding his hand. His mother looked at him wide-eyed and started nudging his father who was asleep on a chair next to her. She started crying, clearly exhilarated. He was confused. For how long was he gone?
They explained to him that it has been a week since a car hit him and they feared he would not wake up. They also told him that he recently went through an operation as both his kidneys stopped functioning and he needed a replacement. He suddenly remembered what happened before the car slammed him and asked where his sister was. His parents looked at him sadly with tears welling up in their eyes. “She died, in a car crash” was not what he expected to hear.
It has been 6 years after the incident. He couldn't help feeling happy that his sister is now gone. He doesn’t miss her at all. He felt like he can finally live as himself and not as her brother. Sometimes he felt like she deserves it. He smiled. His bags were packed and he was all ready to go to the United States tomorrow to further his studies. He heard his mother calling him from the master bedroom. He quickly walked there. She had tears streaming down her face and a photo album on her lap. He saw pictures of his sister back when she was a baby. Her mother looked at him and pointed to his stomach. His mother told him, the kidney he had in his body was Lily’s. His mother told him that Lily wasn’t supposed to die but did, due to complications. He stood stagnant, unable to process her words. He sank to his knees, guilt eating him alive. He was consumed with grief. Here he was, happy that she was gone, while she died for him 6 years ago. She died for him.