Monday, April 22, 2013


            Her heart. It was void of emotions. She ignored the stares of the strangers walking past her. She ignored a lady patting her shoulder asking her what the matter was. Her long hair spread out around her and she could feel it being stepped on by the people walking past her. She ignored it. She kept her eyes closed and stayed there, lying on the pavement.

            She banged on his door, feeling frustrated. “Ugh, where is he?”. He hasn’t been answering her calls for a week now. She knew he was still alive as someone said she saw him just this morning. She banged the door again but there was still no answer. Why was he ignoring her?

            After what it felt like hours, she opened her eyes. It was dusk. She contemplated what to do while walking slowly along the pavement. She could stab herself with a knife? Maybe a gunshot through the heart? But she was sure of one thing; her life had to end.

            She’s been in a relationship for 5 years with Zac. “Why is he doing this?”. She walked away from his room. She was about to climb the stairs when she heard muffled voices from behind it. She stopped; her heartbeat accelerated when she heard a guy’s voice. It was him. She heard a girl’s giggle and her heart seemed to falter.

            She kept walking with her head down. “Where am I going to find a gun?”. She sighed. She pushed out thoughts of her family. Nothing was going to stop her. Only a miracle could save her, and she knows those don’t exist.

            She saw them in each other’s arms. The guy who she thought has loved her for 5 years and the girl who has been her best friend for 10 years. They realised her gaping at them and quickly let go of each other. "Too late for that scumbags". She ran. She didn’t know where she would go but she ran. Away from the people she thought loved her. She ran.

            It was getting cold. Rain was pouring down in torrents and she shivered, hugging her bare shoulders. She was wearing a tank top and shorts. “Maybe I could stay out here and just die of pneumonia”. She crouched down and kept hugging herself. It was getting very cold. Suddenly the rain seemed to have stopped. She looked up and saw a man holding an umbrella above her. A woman appeared by her side and they both ushered her into a car. “I’m being kidnapped. I guess it doesn’t matter.”

             She heard them asking her endless questions but she ignored them. She heard something weird playing in the car. Was it a song? It didn’t seem like a song. It was like someone was reading words but in a singing kind of way. What was it? Whatever it was, it seemed to calm her. It puzzled her. She looked beside her, at the woman who had kidnapped her; she was wearing a cloth on her head. “Muslims”. She knew them as terrorists. She wasn’t surprised that they were the ones who had kidnapped her.

            The car stopped. The woman took her hand and pulled her out of the car. She followed. She was being led into a house. Inside, the man gave her some sort of black dress, which was loose and was told to wear it over her clothes. She did as was told. The woman led her into a bedroom upstairs and told her to bathe and wear the loose dress. She did as was told. After the bath, the woman was still in the room sitting patiently on the bed. She sat down beside the woman, cautiously. The woman then asked what she was doing in the rain, and looked at her with kindness. The horrid memories went through her mind and she suddenly burst into tears. The woman hugged her and she was overwhelmed with warmth. She heard the woman say Allah is there you, Allah is there for you. She didn’t know what it meant but she took comfort in those words. She took comfort in the fact that this Allah is there for her.

5 years later

She smiled at them, the people who took her in when she was helpless. She has embraced this religion she previously thought was full of violence. Only now does she understand how peaceful Islam is. Her parents still have not embraced it but thankfully, accepted her. She hoped they would embrace this beautiful deen soon. Jo and Zac seems like distant memory. She has said goodbye to her past self now, hoping to never see her again. She looked around the room at Maryam, Jamil and her parents, sitting together at the dining table and felt thankful. She has finally found peace. Alhamdulillah.

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