Distress

Emotional breakdowns have been coming more frequently now.
Tears accompanied me for the past few days.
My sorrow transformed into anger and made my mood unstable.
Too much stress and no best friends around me.

I've been feeling so lonely. I've been feeling useless. I've been feeling as if everyone looks at me with hatred. I've tried telling myself over and over again that it's okay. They're not worth thinking about. I kept telling myself to be strong and not to care. I kept telling myself that it's something I need, to improve myself.

But then a friend ignored me and made me unstable. Making me unsure of myself. Making me hate myself. For being so bad till even my friends hate me.

Thank God Farhanah is always there for me. She kept telling me to ignore them and that so many other people loved me. But it's hard to hold on to those words when she's not here beside me.

I wish I was a better person. I wish I was likeable. I wish I could be a better friend.
I wish I had more control over my anger.

I just hate myself.

But then Allah's always there for me. Allah is the best listener. And insyaAllah he'll show me the right way and help me.
Like what Cikgu Radzi said
Thank you Allah, we love you Allah.

Pray for me to become a better person.